Friday, December 28, 2007

Thursday, December 20, 2007

updates

Well, no sighting of my white puppy prince today, but good news is it looks like I can move into the condo for sure!

I've known this for awhile but forgot to blog about it. I'm pretty excited. They said it wouldn't hurt for me to shed a few pounds but whatever.

That means I have until August to make my move with the neighbor dog. Although, who knows what awaits in the new neighborhood!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

All I want for Christmas is...him

i'm infatuated with the dog next door. he looks like a white scottish terrior. he is sooo cute, but doesn't much notice me.

I get so nervous when he comes out in his yard I can't even bark! just kind of freeze up.

How should I approach him??????????

yours fondly,

petrifiedpeanut

Monday, December 17, 2007

Muzzle Tov

My visit to see Santa Claus started off great. I was treated to a long ride in the car. I got to sit on Sara's lap and she didn't even comment on how much I weighed and then....we got to the store, where it turned ugly... smartpet or something like that. They put a muzzle on me so I wouldn't bite the other puppies :(

It was humiliating. Other dogs got to wear holiday sweaters and I got to wear a muzzle. I looked like the guy from silence of the lambs (but cuter of course).

I didn't much care for Santa either. Weird suit, smelled weird, talked weird. Well you can judge for yourself. Listen to them cackle at my most embarrasing moment!!!




Thursday, December 13, 2007

rainy day

It rained on me during my morning "visit" to the backyard. I hate being wet and I don't like being left outside for more than three minutes.

As my revenge I barrelled in the house with my muddy paws! Ran through the carpet in the living room, jumped up on the bed and finished off on the couch. That'll learn them.

p.s. we're getting brand new carpet soon!

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Doggiewood Here I Come!

Not sure, but there is talk of someone getting a video camera for Christmas. This may mean I could be making some big / small screen appearances on the blog in the near future. That would be cool.


I would request following for my dressing room (aka the backyard shed):

- 10 pounds of fresh roast beef

- a No Kitties allowed sign

- 20 bones and rope tug toys so I could work out my nerves before the filming begins.

- a personal belly scratcher who would follow me on set.

- a tin of doggie breath mints as to not offend my co-stars during romantic or close-talker scenes.


Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Jack the Wripper


Word on the street is this little fellow can tear up carpet like none other. He's also known to drink beer from time to time which may explain why he is such a little wripper. It's not good for his belly I'm sure but when you have a wild and crazy owner those things happen unfortunately. Be strong Jack!

Monday, December 10, 2007

still no word

today was gloomy and rainy and i just kind of pawed my treat around. not really interested in my food or my toys. Very unlike me.

Think i'm still nervous about the condo and sleeppppy.

Friday, December 7, 2007

Weight Wars


So we should hear back today whether or not they'll allow me to stay in the condo. Most people have a 25 pound and under rule and unfortunately I haven't been sticking to my diet and weigh close to 50!!!!!!!!!

Keep your paws crossed. I don't know what I'm going to do if I can't go!!!

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

The chocolate version of me and the next door neighbor cat


Take that suitcase

So what if she had to sit in an airport for 6 hours , miss her flight to NY due to weather, only to come back to me in Kentucky?

The important thing is she came back! We ate ham, watched TV played ball and slept in the ole bed till 7:30 a.m.!!!!!!!!!!!

Life is good. Now I just have to work on getting Jeremiah back home from los angeles.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Pack me for once!


They say that certain things mean certain things to certain people / puppies. To me the suitcase means sadness. I hate that rolling bag that gets in my way and smells funny from being stored in the garage. And most of all I hate knowing that someone will be leaving me again while they go on a trip.


Woe is me.....

Monday, December 3, 2007

A work of art


Some folks were painting the bedroom yesterday and I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. I soon got bored, snuggled up to the wall and fell asleep on the paint. Not cool. Who knows when I'll get my next bath??

Friday, November 30, 2007

Sleepy laps


You know you really get along with someone when you can cuddle up right there in their lap after only knowing each other a few hours. This is my turkey day nap.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

frisbee woes

Do you ever get frustrated when a frisbee is flipped over and you can't flip it back no matter how hard you claw at it?


wasn't sure if that happened to everyone or just me.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Holy Peanut!


One of my owners got pulled over by a cop this morning for running a red light. Now me, I run around my backyard freely and rarely ever get a warning let alone a ticket so not sure what her deal was.


In the case that I was pulled over I doubt I would sit quietly if an officer tried to approach me. You should have seen what I did to a fireman who stopped by collecting change for charity. Nearly barked his head off! Something about a guy in uniform that gets me extra barky.









Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Budget


We're thinking about moving, which means we'll all be on a really tight budget for the next few months. Yes, even me. I saw some post-it notes and that's what I'm allotted.

If I' m a bit more grumpy than usual you'll know why. $$$$$
Plus there is talk I won't be allowed to come to the condo unless I lose weight, learn how not to bark or shed my dogness and can pass as a toddler. This is not looking good for me.

Monday, November 26, 2007

So I didn't get the turkey...

no turkey, no stuffing, no deviled egg. I was robbed.

That said, I did sneak a piece of salami yesterday, a bit o egg this morning and even some crusty old bread left over from a late night sandwich.

I guess the lesson I learned was every day is Thanksgiving day for me and to be thankful for my abundances even if they don't include a drumstick.

Pics from the holiday weekend coming soon! Hope your bellies are doing well.


Numbered List

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Giving Thanks

Most the time I'm growly, itchy and licky, but tomorrow is one day I'll be thankfully. And since I hope to spend most of my time begging for turkey and snatching up crumbs of stuffing I thought I should give my thanks now.

I'm thankful for...

Jeremy, he's a wonerful owner

belly scratches

My friends Laura, Sara, Bobby, Aaron, Adam, Cindy, Terry, CP and CP's owners

lamb and rice

scraps on the floor

days it doesn't rain

my couch

walks and truck rides

my bucket of toys

and....most of all....easy access to my backyard

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

paw lickin good


I ate chicken off the bone for breakfast this morning.


I was in heaven!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Fun Fact: Colonel Sanders didn't start KFC until he was in his mid-sixties. That means there is still hope for all of us middle aged pups out there with big ideas and even bigger bellies.

Monday, November 19, 2007

Pampered Pooch



I was doing my daily reading (which usually includes US Weekly, Life & Style and Dog Fancy). Anyhow, came across a new line of beauty products from Juicy Couture for the pampered pooch. nailpolish, perfume (achoo!) and more.


I kinda want this stuff but I think it would only accentuate the fact that I'm not too dainty. Any thoughts?

Friday, November 16, 2007

????


I may be a little rough around the edges when it comes to bathroom etiquette (been known to drink from the toliet, been known to sniff out other doggies' doo doo, you get the picture), but even I wouldn't design such an unusual toy. Introducing the plush poo & pee dolls.


Thursday, November 15, 2007

Modeling...is there a future?

Word on the street is my paw pal CP (aka coco puff) is thinking about modeling. He's starting off with a doggie calendar shoot held at his local park in Chicago and I'm certain, will be moving on to bigger and better things in no time.

My questions is could I also be a good candidate? Is there a need for plus-sized dog models?

Me vs. CP

Me - 7 years old. Big belly. Underbite / Overbite. Doesn't play well with others. Graying.

CP - In his prime (2 - 3 years old). Skinny as a rail. Beautiful shiny fur. White teeth. Real friendly.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

not my hero

Guitar Hero has invaded our house. Suddenly everyone is a heavy metal headbanger and I am left utterly confused. The electronic keyboard I could handle. Sure it wasn't the coolest but at least I could play a few notes with my paw. This guitar is far too difficult.

Just when you think the wii can not get any worse. It does. I mean it wiiiilly wiiilly does.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Teeth Issues


I'm not the only one with an underbite...or is it overbite? Come back soon D!

Monday, November 12, 2007

The best weekend

I had house guests in this weekend it was really one of the best weekends ever! They played with me for hours on end, they petted me, they took me for walks AND they fed me cheetos. So all and all pretty good weekend.

Sure they commented on my obesity but then again who doesn't?

Pics to come soon!

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Happy Home

He's Home. She's Home. My puppy heart is finally at piece.

Things I do when I am happy:

- Eat all my food

- Don't mess on the kitchen floor

- Play with giraffe head and all other toys

- Lick lots of faces and wag my small nub tail til it almost falls off!

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Lapping up Luxury


When the water bowl just won't do...I need this.


Woof Water,
Whenever the collapse of Western civilization comes up, it’s always blamed on hedonism or TV or R-rated movies. But what’s also to blame is our approach to pet ownership. Not only do we insist on clothing these animals, which are usually covered in fur already, but we spoil them with designer products. For example, Avery’s Beverages is coming out with a new bottled water for dogs called “Woof Water.” What the target market here doesn’t know is that there already is a water for dogs. It’s called water. Look it up on Wikipedia. On the plus side, “a portion of proceeds from Woof Water sales will go to the Our Companions Domestic Animal Sanctuary,” which is committed to ending the euthanasia of healthy animals. I support this wholeheartedly. Save that precious bye-bye juice for people who buy Woof Water.
—Posted by David Kiefaber

Monday, November 5, 2007

Perfecto

In a perfect world ...

I'd have a doggie door and could go in and out as I pleased.

I'd have a chauffeur to take me for rides around the block.

I could reach the high shelf where the snacks are stashed.

Friday, November 2, 2007

halloween night

You think you had a scary halloween night? I was locked out in the backyard with the ghost of Cinammon and a full moon.

Sure they gave me a twizzler and a few nerds when i got back inside...trust me. it wasn't worth it.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Fame is a b*tch, and so am i (it's okay.technically I am)

I've gone international!

Check out Dogs with Blogs (based in Australia) - http://www.dogswithblogs.com.au/theblogslite.htm- and scroll down to Peanut Head / Indiana.

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Wiiiiiiiii whatz the big deal?

Since the Wii has made its way into my home several things have happened.

- I get hit in the head more often (by swinging controllers).

- I have new daytime visitors who drop by to practice throughout the week (they know the garage code).

- I have new nighttime visitors who cut into my evening couch routine (P.S. I need my beauty sleep).

- I am told to steer clear of any games, wires, swinging arms (P.P.S. This is MY kingdom).

Not sure I like this Wii. It has no rope, no ball, no bells, no real reason to attract such attention.

Me? I'll stick to stick.

Monday, October 29, 2007

it's raining men

I have 2 boyfriends. A bobby and a breadwinnie. I love them both but I'm partial to one. Will never tell which it is.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Y ask Y

Is it really that much fun to throw a towel over my head and watch me squirm out of it?

Thursday, October 25, 2007

tick tack paddy whack


I had a tick on my earrrrrrrrrrrr!


They burnt it off and took it off with tweezers. It was gross. I loved the attention.


Tuesday, October 23, 2007

sometimes

sometimes people go to california and forget to take me with them.

sometimes rachel ray has pet friendly recipes in her magazine and no one makes them for me.

And sometimes, yes, sometimes... i stink.

Monday, October 22, 2007

eeewwwww

i don't know why but i got real stanky last night. ....And i had a bloody foot.


pssst. hi coco puff!

Friday, October 19, 2007

Trickster

This morning's breakfast update. i ate real fast and when he came out of the shower he had no idea i had already eaten my first bowl and he poured a second bowl!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can u believe it????

unfortunately i was busted by "her" and the bowl of food was removed. I licked the crumbs out of the bottom of the now empty bowl and started plotting my next meal scam.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

homecoming

he's coming home and i am happier than a puppy in a puddle of mud.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

my favs in order

1. rope hose
2. wrecking ball
3. cat toy (only because it's new)
4. orange stick
5. regular ball
6. tough tug
7. aluminum foil
8. random bugs

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

rain = pain

I was carried out into the rain. Thrown on the patio and not allowed back in until I peeeed. Ridiculous. Everyone knows I don't pee in the rain.

Monday, October 15, 2007

Me vs. My aaaa meee

Pros to Miami:

- Palm Trees
- Beach
- Cool Clubs
- Sun Tans
- Umbrella Drinks
- P. Diddy

Pros to Jeffersonville:

- Backyard tree
- Ohio River
- Johnny D's
- Sunburnt necks
- Early Times and Cokes
- P. Head

Why he chose Miami I'll never know.

Friday, October 12, 2007

Dogs Behaving Badly

I bark in the dark when they are asleep because I want to, yea I want to

I pee on the floor, and I've done it before cuz I want to, yea I want to

I ate off the table, because I am able and I want to, yea I want to.

I take all day long to lay a big shlong because I want to, yea I want to

YOU want to play ball well you ain't getting it at all, I don't want you to, yea don't want you to!!!

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Taking care of biznast

From time to time when I am in the backyard doing my thing, I've noticed them peering out the window impatiently. Sure they have to let me back in, but does everything have to be on their time table? This morning they crossed the line and actually yelled, "Poo already peanuthead!!"

Come on. Seriously??? My biznast, is my biznast and it can't be rushed.

Monday, October 8, 2007

Friday, October 5, 2007

friends 4 eva

the next door neighboor got two dogs and they barked at me through the fence and ran around in circles.

It's like we knew each other all our lives.

Of course I tuckered out way before they did. But, it was good while it lasted.

Thursday, October 4, 2007

lambandrice strike

Until he returns, no more lamb and rice pellets. I could waste away...that is if he's gone for like two years.

Sigh.

P.S. I slept on his pillow last night!!!!!!!! That'll learn him.

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

suitcase sadness :(

He left...again.

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

paaaaaaaaaartay!

My tips for a guarenteed good time:

- Greet each guest with a menacing growl. It puts them in a festive mood.

- If ten people show up, only try to bite 3 of them. You need allies at some point.

- If people are distracted and leave you out of the conversation, snag some grapes off the coffee table and whatever else you can reach.

- If they still ignore you. Crawl on their laps or poke your head in between them to get attention.

Friday, September 28, 2007

drunken doggie fun

Sheesh this isn't a lesson but rather a tale of all tails. One of my owners turned into a dog yesterday. It's true. She was wasted got on the ground and wrastled me just like a dog, stole my orange stick and then she bit the other owner. HOLY PEANUT!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, September 27, 2007

stormy troubles

Puppy Lesson #6: When the storms come a roarin' cuddle up to those who are snorin'.

If no one's there to snuggle, hit the kitchen and make a puddle.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Levels of Lazy

Puppy Lesson #5: Levels of Lazy

Level 3 sleeping on the couch till noon

Level 2 not blogging for six days

Level 1 (drum roll) pretending the kitchen floor is the backyard when you have to go.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Live by the bed, get kicked out of the bed

Puppy lesson #4: If you make yourself too comfy at the end of someone else's bed you will eventually get kicked at some point in the night. Embrace your couch space.

Friday, September 14, 2007

Freedom

Puppy Lesson #3: Freedom from the bark

When you let go and allow yourself to be free there is nothing to protect and no reason to get all barky. You can hold your head high and let those other caged fools bark as you strut by.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

A bone to pick

Puppy Lesson #2:

When the world won't play with you and your bone, there's no shame in playing with your bone by yourself. Even if they look at you funny.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

puppy lessons

to give my blog more structure I've decided to stop rambling and to start getting focused.

Thus I give you puppy lessons. Insights into living your life better via a puppy (me).

Lesson #1: A watched bowl never fills. - If you go outside and run around when you return there will be food and water.

PH

Monday, September 10, 2007

tiny bows

The lady across the street got what they call a toy poodle..except it was no toy. It was young and blond and everyone coddled it. They called it Daisy and everyone awwww-ed.

Of course I saw all of this from a distance because I was put in the backyard for bad behavior. From the window I could make out a purple beaded collar and a tiny pink bow in her hair.

I know I'll never be the bow type with my swinging belly and my fierce bark. And I know I'm way past the age of cute and cuddly. But when no one's home I sometimes stare in the mirror and practice my prance and imagine myself svelt, young and stylish with an ever so incredible tiny , tiny bow.

I could pull off pink...really I could.

Saturday, September 8, 2007

They're Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

Sure, I was mad and hurt that they didn't pack me up. I took it out on stick for a few days...wouldn't even touch him. Threw him under the chair and made him stay put. Even stopped eating until wrecking ball knocked some sense into me....literally.

At the end of the day, how can I stay mad? What's the old saying...don't bite the hand that feeds you? Wait...I did that. Either way, I am butt wiggling happy to have them home.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

You explain it...

I have the littlest nose in this house but the loudest snore.

Go figure.

grumblings from the stomach o' peanut

lambandricelambandriceeverydayitslambandrice

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

The P Word

I know that I'm not, but I like it when they still call me puppy.

Who wouldn't?

Monday, August 27, 2007

Seriously, I'm getting old

Today I came face to face with a reality - It's too high for me this bed.

I can't jump like I use to. I have to wind up like a major league pitcher, heave my lamb and rice filled belly into the air and pray that I can get at least two paws up on the mattress.

It's humilating. What ever happened to sleeping bags?

To amuse them

I often run around the house and jump and bark and drool to amuse my owners. One of the best tricks I have learned is to get really excited about my "treat."

Every day they shake a bottle and entice me with what is supposed to be a treat. It's a vitamin. It's a musty, dusty, tan pellet of a vitamin.

I know this. But they don't know that I know this and it makes them happy.

A good day

A good day is when someone chases me around the house and tries to yank my toy from me.

A good day is finding a scrap of beef under the couch. A good day is going for a ride in the red pick up with my head out the window (this rarely happens).


A VERY good day is when my ears don't itch and the grass man leaves the gate open.

It's all in the nub

You may ask yourself, peanut, why is your tail so short and stumpy?

Truth be told I can't recall. I think I may have chewed it off or perhaps it was stunted from birth (I'm not very large to begin with or at least I'm not very tall).

Whatever the case. It doesn't not matter because I can wiggle my "nub" in such a manner that no one even notices it isn't fluffy.